Sunday, February 20, 2011

Dear You's

This didn't go over very well on FB, so I'm moving it here as sort of an archive. Edited one that changed.

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As part of 2011, in a vain attempt to jump on the whole "new start" train that affects 99% of the world's population but never actually gets followed through, I'm going to get a few things off my chest.

This is purely for my benefit. I am not writing this so people can try and figure out who these are directed at. Do not ask, I will not tell you. This is of course, assuming anyone even sees/bothers to read this.

Obviously, I'm not writing one about every single person in my friends list. These are the people who I have the most intense feelings about, who are constantly on my mind.

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Dear You,

You told me once that I am like an older brother to you.

I didn't know siblings toyed with each other's emotions and strung them along on a lie.


Don't know if I can forgive you right now.


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Dear You,

I really just don't like you. I don't like your jokes. I don't like how you think you're funny, because you're not. I don't like how you try to be edgy and it just comes off as you being a d-bag. I honestly believe that your views on Christianity are completely skewed.

I hate how a certain person acts when they're around you. I consider them to be one of my closest friends and you turn them into a jerk, just like you.

Please examine your life.

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Dear You,

I care about you so much.

Why are you taking this path? Why must you be one of those disgusting pigs who only cares about looks and reputation? Who doesn't look down the long-term path, yet only thinks of who you can bang now? This doesn't fit you, and it doesn't fit what God wants for you.

Please, stop. For your sake and mine.

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Dear You x 5,

You've saved me. Thank you.

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Dear You,

You confound me. You make my life miserable. I hate being around you. I'm scared to talk to you, afraid of saying the wrong thing.

And yet, I love you. You make life great. I look forward to when I see you next. I yearn to talk to you, having a conversation about anything and everything.

How can one person make me feel this way? Please, make up your mind. Make up MY mind. Why do I care so much about your approval, about always looking good in your eyes? About adjusting my life to fit into yours?

Let me go. Love me or hate me. Be my friend or my enemy. I can not make this choice for myself. You have to.

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Dear You,

If there is one person in this world who I can honestly say I hate, it is you. Everything about you disgusts me.

You are a huge jerk who only cares about themselves. Everything you do is only done to draw more attention to you. Even when you say you want to be alone and that you're hurting, it's ONLY so people will take notice to you.

Why do you dangle your "friends" on a string? If everyone knew who you really were, no one would talk to you. No one would like you. Your life would be full of misery and emptiness, which is no less than you deserve.

Even the look of you makes me cringe. I try not to judge based on outside appearances, but nature must REALLY hate you.

It makes me laugh that people tell me that you are so kind and loving and caring. It makes me laugh and cry to hear that you've fooled yet another person.

You're never happy. You always want. You're never grateful for the things that are given to you. You are SO BLESSED AND YOU DON'T EVEN CARE. You only are focusing on something bad that happened a LONG TIME AGO. Most people would move on with their life, and stop trying to garner sympathy from such events. But you have to try and milk it for all it's worth.

I honestly believe that everyone would be happier if you would just disappear.

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I may add more as I feel the need to.

posted by Andyroo @ 11:29 PM 0 Comments

Sunday, February 13, 2011

V-Day

I'm going to write in an attractive red color for V-Day. ISN'T THAT GRAND?

In all seriousness, I am a public hater of Valentine's Day. I don't see why we should celebrate a day that overprices chocolate and greeting cards and makes singles feel crappy about themselves.

But that's not what this post is about.

This is about girls. Or at least, the mentality of girls as seen and observed by a man. A male, being myself, who has some interest and experience in the human psyche, and understands it quite a bit as well.

But I am completely flabbergasted by some of the things that girls seem to think.

Here's the thing. Girls always play the victim when it comes to relationships. Guys are always the one that must stay faithful, must never stare at another girl, always pick them up for the dates, always pay for their food and ticket. If you think about it, the girls are kind of holding the leash. At least in all stereotypical relationships. Watch any romantic comedy, and this is the kind of relationship you'll find.

All girls are "scared about the guy only wanting to get in their pants" and bla bla crap crap. Truth is, how many GIRLS are just in it for sex as well? There are just as many sluts as there are man whores. How many girls lust after other men once they're in a relationship? Why is the guy always in the wrong?

Girls are always the ones that say "don't lead me on" or "you played with my emotions" or something like that. Why is the guy not allowed to say that?

Some guys are sensitive. Guys have feelings too. WE'RE HUMAN, JUST LIKE GIRLS. Just because we have a Y chromosome, doesn't make us immune to being hurt. When I start to express my feelings openly, and you in turn reciprocate those advances, and flirt and text and do whatever, and have nothing driving that passion, it hurts. A lot.

I don't care if you're scared to say it. Saying "I'm not interested" is a HECK of a lot easier, for BOTH of us, than giving me mixed signals and leading me on. And a lot less painful. Maybe if you had just told me to shove it 4 months ago, instead of talking to me MORE, I wouldn't have a hole in my heart right now.

So thanks for nothing.

Screw V-Day.

posted by Andyroo @ 9:55 PM 1 Comments

Saturday, January 15, 2011

A query

I'm going to ask you to entertain a notion for a second.

What do you think about death?

Are you scared of it? Does it worry you? What?

For a long time, and even still, my point of view has been "Why on Earth, being a Christian, would you NOT want to die?". And I can confidently say that I still feel this way. If we're following him, there's a reward for us that's a million trillion times better than anything we could ever hope to have here on Earth.

But let's not misunderstand each other.

For those who don't know, I have chronic on-and-off depression. I have struggled with this for quite some time now. And the above opinion can often be confused, even within me. I have to draw the line between "Accepting Death" and "Wanting Death". It's a very, VERY fine line and as Christians, we have to make sure we stay on the accepting half of it.

That's all I have to say for now.

posted by Andyroo @ 8:22 PM 0 Comments

Monday, November 29, 2010

Mario Party 9

Ok, so I don't know if there are plans to make a Mario Party 9. I honestly don't care, because 8 of these things already exist not including one on the DS AND GBA, plus an E-reader one.

What I'm saying, however, is IF Mario Party 9 is created, I don't see why it can't be the best one in the series.

Mario Party was a part of my childhood. I remember being a tot of mere 9 years when me and Sydney would play Mario Party, her always picking Peach, me always picking Yoshi, and duking it out to wonderful stages, beautiful music, and super fun mini-games. It was a grand old time. Mario Party 2 and 3 only heightened the experience.

However, once it moved to the GCN, it started to go downhill. There were still moments of glory, but 4 on was riddled with boring, unimaginative mini-games, dull stages, and an all around not fun to play environment.

So, here are some ideas for you, Nintendo. Instead of making a Mario Party 9, make a Mario Party Gold, or something like that, rehashing and updating all of the things that made the series great in the first place. And if you MUST make a Mario Party 9, here are some ideas for you:

BRING BACK:

- CLASSIC MINI GAMES
Ok, so what was one of the main reasons that Mario Party was fun? Umm...because the mini-games were fun. This is a NO brainer. I can't recall a single memorable mini game from the fourth installment on, yet the first three were riddled with MASTERPIECES, such as Mario Bandstand, Move to the Music, Bumper Balls, Bombs Away, Shy Guy Says, and SO. MANY. OTHERS. It would not be a crime to recreate some of them. Which brings me to...

- 4 PLAYER CO-OP MINI GAMES
I don't understand what happened to these. Key-Pa-Way and Running of the Bulb were two of the BEST mini games in the series to date. And they were from the FIRST GAME! Why on earth, Nintendo, would you just abandon this concept? I honestly don't get it. Please, someone explain it to me?

- DONKEY KONG AS A PLAYABLE CHARACTER
This one is just stupid. Making DK an NPC was one of the most idiotic things I saw throughout this series. His NPC status literally added nothing to the game, the DK games were boring, unimaginative, and just corny. It's almost mean. You give us a character from RARE for a couple of games and then just take him away. I liked playing as DK every once in a while, you jerks.

- COSTUMES
Ok, this is just something that I personally liked, but it was neat! It was innovative. It added charm to the second Mario Party, and I was disappointed that they've never made a reappearance. Please, Nintendo? Humor me and all the other fans that like small little things like this.

- MINI GAMES WHERE MORE THAN ONE PERSON/NO ONE MIGHT WIN
These games were so much fun! Games like Face Lift, Crazy Cutter, Bombs Away, they were GREAT. They really added that sense of competition, and more often than not they were just the most fun out of the bunch. Also, on a related note, the entire concept of being able to lose coins after mini games was a good idea too.

- SOLO MINI GAMES
This is pretty self explanatory. They were fun. They allowed people to get ahead or fall behind. Bring them back.

- STAGES WITH GIMMICKS
I still hold up Witch Land (or w/e its called) from Mario Party 2 as one of the best boards in the entire franchise, because of the nifty night/day mechanic that it utilized. I realize that this entire concept was later used for Mario Party 6 (I think, might've been 7), but when one concept applies to the ENTIRE game, it's not as imaginative. Create a plethora of boards with unique gimmicks.

- ITEMS
Orbs? Candy? No. Nononononono. Stop it. The WORST. Bring back the classic items please. Magic Lamp, Golden Mushroom, the whole shebang.

EDIT:

- PLAYABLE CHARACTERS
You had this right for a while. Mario Party 3 was almost perfect. SO CLOSE. But then you just got stupid. I mean, look at the last couple of games. BIRDO?! HAMMER BRO?! REALLY? You took away DK and gave us a generic Mario baddie and...a creepy transvestite thing? The list of playable characters should be Mario, Luigi, Yoshi, Peach, DK, Wario, Waluigi, Daisy, Toad, and Bowser (explained in a minute). This would be the perfect assortment. No more, no less.

- THE VILLAIN
Bowser is old. Bowser is lame. No one likes Bowser as the villain anymore. It's expected. It's not innovative. He (and you) are running out of ideas. So here's an idea. Mario and Bowser have teamed up before. So...make a new villain, and have Bowser be a playable character. It's alright, Nintendo, not having Bowser be the baddie in one game isn't going to make anything explode.

- STORY MODE
 Once again, you used to have this right. The Mario Party 3 story mode was so much fun, and then it morphed into this...thing where one player just goes up against rainbow mini bowsers. What?

CREATE:

- 6 PLAYER+ BATTLE ROYALE
Just as the name implies. Even if you have 4 people playing head to head, everyone likes beating the crap out of the computer players. So let 4 friends compete with extra computer players. It could create the potential for some great mini-games too. Turns would take forever...but that leads me to...

- SOMETHING TO DO WHILE WAITING FOR TURNS
Waiting for your turn is boring. This has been a proven fact throughout 8 of these games. You're Nintendo. You're creative. Make up something that will entertain us while we wait.

- CO-OP STORY MODE
The name says it all. I can't believe this hasn't been created yet.

This is all I can think of for now, but there are so much more possibilities for this series to be great again. All it takes is some brainpower and some common sense, Nintendo. Chop chop.

posted by Andyroo @ 12:59 AM 0 Comments

Monday, May 24, 2010

Video Game Review: Final Fantasy XIII

Well hello again. This'll be the first of hopefully many video game reviews. I realize that probably no one will read this/cares, but I do, and it makes me feel important to be reviewing games, so I'm gonna do it.

FINAL FANTASY XIII

Intro - FFXII is the 13th game in the Final Fantasy franchise. Actually, that's a lie. It's the FOURTY-THIRD (I know right? Seriously, WTC) entry into the Final Fantasy franchise, developed by Square Enix. But for all practical purposes, let's just pretend it's the thirteenth.

Starting Off - It starts off with the protagonist, Lightning (an alias, don't worry), and her...friend? Partner? Actually, they hardly know each other. Anyway, his name is Sazh, and they're running on top of trains fighting monsters in what looks like the apocalypse. Great start.

In this opening chapter (of which there are 13, oh ho, i c wat u did thar Square Enix), all of the playable characters are introduced with the exception of one: Lightning and Sazh, one of which is a serious ex-cop who has so much stoicism and arrogance that you just want to punch her in the face, and the other of which is a black cowardly...something. The game doesn't do really well at telling us who the characters are right away. With Final Fantasy, it takes some time. The other three characters introduced to us are Snow (which I guess is his real name), which seems to be searching for his fiance and also uses his fists for fighting (cuz weapons are for WIMPS) and is so smug and cocky that I'd like to punch HIM in the face as well. Vanille is a girl with orange/pink hair and takes the kookie role this game which she plays with ease. Hope (I've basically given up on anyone having normal names anymore) is an angsty 12 year old whose mom is dead and doesn't have any will to live.

Because there's so little to say about it, let's get the GOOD things out of the way. The scenery, cinematography, and graphics are GORGEOUS. It's obvious that the design team worked down to their bones in this aspect, and it's great; even the in-game graphics look awesome. The voice acting is pretty good, at least better than some games, and...that's it.

That's literally the ONLY NICE THINGS I can say about the game. I am a HUGE Final Fantasy fan. I've played through 7 and 10 more times than I can count and the others can at least hold a flame to it. But 13 is TERRIBLE. What I gather is that Square Enix tried to make it appeal to non-fans, but what's the point of that? People who aren't fans of Final Fantasy probably aren't fans of J-RPG's in general, so changing almost everything about the game isn't going to help.

Gameplay - BORING AS CRAP. All it consists of is walking down a linear corridor and fighting monsters. Eventually you'll get to a boss fight. Then a 10 minute cutscene. Lather, Rinse, Repeat.

Battles - Also boring as crap. Monsters have huge chunks of life and since you can only control one character, each battle is almost assured to last at least five minutes. The battle system is annoying and monotonous as well.

Story - Same recycled plot. Evil authority. Rebels who try to take it down. Conflict. Resolution. Not to mention that it takes about 25 in-game hours just to start to get to know the characters AND to get your final party member.

Difficulty - RIDICULOUS. FF13 has the most ridiculous difficulty curve I've ever encountered in a game. For the first half of the game, you can get by by just fighting the occasional monster and boss battles. About halfway through the game, it becomes IMPOSSIBLE. Some boss battles took me 5 or 6 tries and I had to look at a guide to figure out how to beat it, and even some normal battles are insanely difficult, especially around the last two chapters.

Multiplayer - None. No online anything either.

Last thoughts - To continue on about the difficulty, part of the Final Fantasy routine (or basically any RPG in general) is grinding battles. However, a good game will make you want to grind so you can beat that boss, and a bad game will make you not care in the slightest and only get you annoyed. In FFX, I literally spent hours before the fight with Yunalesca to get Yuna her Holy ability, because it was and still is the only way I can beat her. However, in FFXIII, I had no want to grind. I was getting impatient with how difficult the monsters were and quit more than a couple times. Nothing made me want to try harder to beat the bosses.

Everything in this game is filled with bad ideas. The weapon and accessory upgrading system is pointless and annoying. There are no side-quests at all aside from a stupid hunting thing, and you can NEVER deviate from the main path, except in one short section. This game is 99% linear and BORING.

Bottom Line - If you are really a fan of J-RPG's and Final Fantasy in particular, I would RENT this game or BORROW it from a friend. Don't waste 60 bucks on it.

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posted by Andyroo @ 2:46 PM 0 Comments

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Starting Out

All right, so here we go. New blog, new stuff. I'm mainly going to be using this for whenever I wanna write something, maybe I'll pop out a few reviews, like video games and movies and such, just to make myself feel like a self important person who's life isn't for naught. Haha, j/k.

But in all seriousness, this is just a test drive. If I get bored or feel like this is useless and stop using it, I'll probably just eventually delete it.

But yeah, for anyone who actually reads this (I'm looking at YOU Rachel and Catherine), enjoy my blatherings. Heh, Blathers. Get it, from Animal Crossing? I'M SO FUNNY. Except not.

K, bainaokthx.

posted by Andyroo @ 11:45 PM 0 Comments